War Casualty

(For Betty)

When the blood finally stopped
The clock in the hallway took the beat
And his hands clench with the rhythm
At home a stranger finding his feet
His coal eyes once filled with pride
Bravely marching with friends to war
Now this still and peace just scares him
Thrusting his vacant gaze to the floor

The little girl he didn't know was born
Curls up on his funny speckled chest
The shrapnel pokes to remind him
There will never be any more rest
Not for him when guns are sounding
Screams running out in his head
The smell of blood, mortar and bones
Makes him wish that he was dead

Betty knows only to speak in whispers
And to hide when father roars
At night when drink and demons come
Pulling him back to crimson shores
Don't cry when his fists fly in the dark
Lashing at the screech in his brain
The doctors try to save her little legs
They're too late and it's all in vain

They can't stay around here anymore
Not when secrets start leaking out
People think he's good company
Until he fits and starts to shout
Mothers says send the girl to school
Knowing he'd kill her if she stays
There's a doctor up in the hospital
Who can help him change his ways

So he is bound like a criminal of war
Belt buckles to restrain his rage
The shock pulses right through him
Electric waves reveal a man of age
In the cell he seems euphoric
A nervous sense of possible relief
A welcome sort of numbness swells
And he collapses without grief

(True story. When my dad died I found a doctors log from World War 2 about my Grandad who was treated in a psychiatric hospital for shell shock. )