Comments : Together

  • 8 years ago

    by Lune de ma vie

    Drain your words of their nectar,
    And fill up my cup once more.
    Quench my thirst for your sweet embrace,
    Nourish my very core.
    ^^^^
    The rhyming scheme is unique and beautifully done in this first stanza. The way you captured the embrace of words as nectar for your soul is truly imaginary way of thinking, but I love it! Longing for that embrace, the I love you's, the I miss you's.. Oh how I can relate to this stanza in great lengths.

    Stoke the fire you've lit in my heart,
    So it may keep us warm at night.
    Then feed your fears to the flames, my love
    And together we'll be alright.
    ^^^^
    Power radiates throughout this stanza, the comfort of your love and tenderness can surmount the fears. The way you are able to pour your emotions and feelings so freely on paper (internet) is truly a gift.
    5/5

  • 8 years ago

    by Em

    This is beautiful but so sad. Wanting that person so much that it hurts.

    Em

  • 8 years ago

    by Golden AnGel Rhapsodist

    Hi Ana,

    this little piece is very captivating. nice choice of words in every line.

    Good day

    Gel

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Hello Anna

    As above, some lovely rhyming throughout this piece; well done.

    Ben

  • 8 years ago

    by Milly Hayward

    Another great little poem. I love the rhyme and style Milly x

  • 7 years ago

    by Alec

    Ok... when I tell Tony about you he's going to flip. He's a hopeless romantic and your writing is right up his alley: Heartfelt, rhymes, rolls off the tongue, and tells a story.