Blood on the Rocks

by Michael D Nalley   Aug 28, 2016


If Cain tended flocks
and Abel tilled soil
Blood got on the rocks
from the futile toil

The fruit used to grow
just by getting wet
when we did not know
evil needed sweat.

Yet after the flood
people were still stoned
to sacrifice blood.
Sins must be atoned.

When man understands
better build with stones,
get dirt on his hands
God will rest his bones

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Latest Comments

  • 8 years ago

    by Bradley Peter

    Hello,

    I'm not very familiar with Cain and Abel, other than I know they're in the Bible - and I think they were brothers - so I'm not able to get much of a connection (that is my fault), but the poem itself did feel like it was important, and something I should know. There was an epic-ness - for want of a better word - to it. It felt like advice. Few poems do, and I really enjoyed that aspect of it.

    Regards,

    Bradley

    P.S. Please comment and vote honestly on every piece you read.

  • 8 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Hello Michael,

    A lovely tight rhyming (a,b,a,b) biblical based poem here.

    It seems humankind is intent on sin; ignoring lessons from the past. War only serves for spilling blood, beating man into submission. Surely we know better that an eye for eye means poor sight for everyone!

    I have a couple of suggestions, I hope you don't mind.

    2nd verse, last line: change 'needs' for 'needed'

    4th verse, 3rd line: adding the word 'on' between 'dirt' and 'his' may improve the flow.

    Michael, a lovely poem with an important message to us all.

    Take care,

    Michael

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