Gas came from nowhere ( Senryu Form)

by Golden AnGel Rhapsodist   Sep 13, 2016


A gas emission
slowly releasing out
made the air stink.

Author's note:

All of my compositions are labor of love, hurt, and pain..
Originally made from my own Experiences.
A copyright not a copycat.

Gel

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Latest Comments

  • 8 years ago

    by Em

    I know that for future reference then Ben, I didn't know.

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Hello Gel

    Well done on this and - although Em is correct, generally speaking - modern senryu/haiku can be 17 syllables or less. She's written some good suggestions there, though.

    Great stuff.

    • 8 years ago

      by Golden AnGel Rhapsodist

      HI Ben,

      thanks Ben mine is also 17 :)

      thanks also to Em for sugessting..

      Gel :)

  • 8 years ago

    by Em

    Haha Gel how funny, a great senryu though usually the syllabus are 5,7,5.

    Here is my suggestion:
    A gas emission
    slowly released from nowhere
    made thin air stinky.

    All the best, Em

    • 8 years ago

      by Golden AnGel Rhapsodist

      Hi Em,

      happy I made u smile. ..Thanks for your suggestion.
      This one will work too

      (made thin air stink)

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