Savannah,

Welcome to the site - this is an excellent first post, imagery rich and metaphor filled that really captured me as I read.
It is often the most beautiful and tempting things that are the most dangerous, I suppose.

Well done, keep writing and all the best,

Ben

Hi and welcome to P&Qs. This is a really great first write from you that flows very well with some great rhyming. Love can be so beautiful but so painful.

Take care, Em

Savannah, I liked this a lot. We all have had those relationships that are the absolute worse for us. You did a wonderful job putting that to words and I'm glad you made it out. Well done-

This is absolutely stunning, and I see you worked the ocean into this piece as I did in the one I just posted. The ocean holds so many beautiful metaphors and is absolutely enigmatic. You did a wonderful job weaving through your anguish, creating a vivid picture of someone floating underwater not dying from drowning, but from a broken heart. The love tryst with life just ironically being broken up by too much of a good thing ... or something like that.

Regardless of my inability to describe how this made me feel, you did a brilliant job. Love this.

5/5
IdTakeABulletForYou