Interesting piece. There is not a lot of true rhythm to this, but somehow - and maybe it's just because I know the way you talk and write, it makes sense for you. It gives the piece its own sense of style and voice. I like how you used condensed sentences, phrases, and even single words to make your points stand out a little more, but I think it was also a bit risky because that really disconnected me from the emotion and point of the piece.

Creatively put together.