A Gamblers story..

I feel vulnerable and weak
my energy drained-strength
I cannot seek.

The lying the cheating
the constant self-beating.
The rattle of pills,
staring down at the bills!

Aftermath. After, aftermath
why can I not learn,
as I always know the aftermath
will return.

The anger I display, along
with the feeling of shame.
The mental torture,
laced with pain.

SHOUTING and BELLOWING.
NO MORE! NO MORE!
striking out at the nearest
door!
A release that hopelessly feeds
to my human flaw.

The people I have hurt,
with lies and deceit
maybe inherited by
a parental cheat!

For endless hours
I stood at mothers
side.
Learning. Absorbing
emotions, she was unable
to hide.
Her dilated eyes,
the euphoria of
winning a prize.
But the lows outnumbered
the highs,
and ended with a
familiar demise!

The hope of food on
the table that night,
an answer only, from her
compulsive delight.
But the writing was always
on the wall,
as we stomped from the
gaming hall.

I will keeping fighting
to halt, and to cease.
what could be possible
of my genetic disease!

I beg you all...

Beware of the Bookmakers
curse,
and wave on by the shiny
black hearse!!