Elixir

Thank you Ben, really appreciate the feedback x

"elixir
poured into my soul
to cure the sins that dance upon my lips"

Killed the game right off the bat. Awesome write. Love the word choice and flow to this one, great write.

Ben

that finds me sat at dusky hours
playing songs on repeat
whilst writing with my tears

^^

These three lines struck a chord with me. I understand them completely!

All the very best and well done on another great write,

Ben

Hey, this is really emotional, powerful and somewhat relatable to many of us within this site and there's some wonderful imagery and I can personally say you are too going to be a fantastic addition to the site.

Elixir
^^
I have to say that I had to look this up and came to the conclusion from the definitions and the piece itself that it means a medicine that is said to cure all ills and all I can say it I need this in my life lol.

poured into my soul
to cure the sins that dance upon my lips
that are reflected in my eyes
to soothe that hurt within
^^
I like the image of this 'make belief' medicine being poured into the deep depths of your soul to take away the sins and to take away the pains of the past. I personally don't think they're sins but unsaid words as they dance on your lips and because you're unable to say them they are reflected in your eyes.

that finds me sat at dusky hours
playing songs on repeat
whilst writing with my tears
time blurs
^^
I guess we have all done this in our hour of need, sat in a dark room, locked the door on the world (or if no lock sat behind the door lol) and just played songs on repeat or at least done something to pass the time to make us feel better but it only does for a few minutes or even seconds unfortunately though I bet not all of us write but it does pass the time I'm a blur, whether slow or fast.

I grip the surface
yet my fingers fall through the nothingness
^^
Loved this part, I think it represents trying to hold onto something that wasn't there to begin with. Just my opinion.

I want to be cured
yet how do you fix the unfix-able
the unseen
the subjective mist
dandelions blown into the wind
^^
This was my favourite part. Why I am not sure buy it was. We cannot fix unfixable things, we can't stop the unseen and unheard but they're there, I like the imagery of dandelions being blown into the wind though I am unsure (though I had a think) on their significance or meaning.

I loved the repetition at the end and yes, I believe each one of us will find a cure to our misfortunes, someday.

Take care, Em