Goodbye Father

I loved you even though you hit me whenever you got mad
Yet the only reason I dealt with it is because you were, after all my biological dad
Hit me hard and take everything I had
Yet you never once sit down to listen to a word I've said

You were always busy, always gone
You'd sit in your room for ages whenever you're home
You want me to be perfect, to be the exact replica of you
But let me tell you this: I'm sorry father, so sorry that I'm not you

When you saw me cutting once, you screamed at me and jumped to conclusions - your anger out of bay
You should have listened to my alibi, if I had killed myself, would you still be this way?
You never led me to believe between choices of wrong and right
I was only fourteen and you expected me to win this fight?!

I pray and plead each night to the shining stars
Thank you for those bruises and those scars
Those were only the physical part
Most of all, I thank you for the emotional and mental trauma that haunts me till this very day - that really tore me apart

I love you though I hold the overbearing grudge inside
You used to be my hero but I've thrown that aside
I hate you now for you're nothing but a stranger to me
Goodbye father, we can't mend broken things so it's better to just leave them be