Merry Christmas?
How do I go on?
Constantly juggling life in my mind
Looking only for reasons why
used to rush through
now I take my time
age creeps up on me
like a sweet red wine
fading into the future before me
I no longer care about time.
Why does my past run my life?
When did it become all I care about?
Now being drunk everyday of my life
how can I let moments of my past
become all I care about.
Why was I not strong?
so easily giving in
constantly filling my body
with so much Gin
When did this all
become the world I live in.
Everyday my mind
devises ways of suicide
It pushes violent nightmares
down on me at night.
But I, for some crazy reason,
chose not to die yet,
So Merry Drunken Christmas
is my blessed good night.
Though I shed tears
It isn't me for who I cry.
I cry for the child
in me that never had
a merry Christmas time.
