have you ever been in a state of depression ?
to the point life looses its meaning
and tears overtake sweat and forget their place
to the point your eyes get dry yet overflown with tears yet to fall
until your heart feels like suffocating as if trapped in a plastic bag
until breathing becomes difficult and sometimes feels useless to even try
until my reflection turns ugly and hard for me to accept
until my heartbeats get weary and my body can't seem to up keep
until my soul feels exhausted and easily gives up
eveyday i go back home
to the place where i feel most alone
under my protective shield-like roof
and behind my knight-like doors
i'm most vulnerable when i'm left alone with the me that dwells inside
it whispers venomous words and manipulates my mind
it tells me words , so outrageous , i can't share
as they weigh so heavily on my chest and accumulate each day
the me that's inside attacks me most during the night
when light surrenders to darkness and emptiness feels so right
it disrupts my sleep and my nowhere to be found peace of mind
it is here to stay , not for an hour , not even for merely a day
it's my truth which i have to accept
and deal with one way or another ,
it is here to stay .