Disappointed but Not Surprised

by Alex Penuelas   Jun 1, 2017


Don't think I
Forgot about you,
My "aunt".

The "aunt"
Who didn't give a damn
About the fact
That we both went
To the same wake and yet
Didn't even make eye contact.

I felt the coldness of your shoulders
As you walked past us in the chapel,
Not even acknowledging
The existence of your nephew
That you once adored.

Yeah. Once.

Because now you
Only see me
As a black sheep,
A cautionary tale,
A freak,
A pervert,
Shameful,
Broken.

Oh and my
Disbelief in your
Zombie Jew on a stick
Isn't what boils your blood
Every time we're in the
Same room together,
Does it, "aunt"?

No,
It's because you think
My mother has wronged You,
Even though all she has
Ever done ever since
You two were little
Was put up with your
Nonsense,
Put up with the fact
That you couldn't hold your liquor
Even at a very young age
When you went out with
Men twice your age.

You think my mother
Is out to get you
And destroy everything
You hold dear,
When the reality is
That she gave you
EVERYTHING
On a silver platter.

She allowed for you
To pay rent that was
Objectively cheaper
Than literally anything
That this city could
Provide for you.

She gave you
The nice apartment
That WE were supposed to
Live in,
Because you were taking care
Of both of your mother's.

She allowed for you
To get first dibs
On many things
Throughout your entire life,
Many to the detriment
Of her reputation.

But the moment
She did something that
Placed herself over you
(Something that she
Should have done
Many years ago),
You immediately threw
Her and everyone else
That associated with her
Under the bus.

Then you did the old
Persecution complex,
Acting like we're in the wrong
Cuz we didn't give our
House to you.

Sorry, "auntie",
But that's not how it work,
And you won't get
Sympathy from
My mother, my father,
My sister and my brother,
Anymore.

You can sit with your
Delusion antics
Surrounded by the
Cheap alcohol that you
Drink every night
In order to fill the void
That is your heart.

Needless to say,
I am glad that within
That body of stone of yours
There's at least a
Façade Of a heart
Still beating in there.

And I'm glad that
You came for my great aunt
In her time of need.

But I still remember
That you decided
Not to show up
The moment my grandpa died.

Why?
Because I was there.

Your little hellspawn,
Your little godless, unsaved trash
Was there,
Tending to my great aunt's broken wounds,
Carrying her in my arms,
Swallowing my pride and
Accepting that at the end of the day
We are all humans that
Need to be loved.

You also didn't show up
Cuz your "snake in the grass"
Little sister was there,
Helping my aunt and I
Stay strong in these
Times of sorrow.

You also taught your kids,
The kids that I looked up to
As my brothers from another mother,
That all spawn of your sister
Are to be classified as
Their enemy.

Sorry,
But I don't remember
My older brother,
My twin sister with autism,
Or myself
Being bad company to
Any of them.

Still,
I'm sad you swallowed them up
In your own
Delusions of grandeur.

I'm disappointed in You,
But I'm Not Surprised
That you acted in such a way
Yesterday,
Acting like we were
Total strangers in a
Room Full of family members.

Needless to say,
I hope that tomorrow is
The last time I see you.

2


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Latest Comments

  • 7 years ago

    by Em

    Spit and post by any chance.. fan bloody tastic!!