We met on my first ever RRT code...
We met when the dead were so fresh they still glowed.
"What you do is important!" As an ass wiping aide?
I cleaned up the body. My mind was made.
Their button down shirts and the calm in their stride,
They came and they went, with tears never cried.
I felt the direction, rip current, high tide.
Ahh what I couldn't know at that bedside.
Through four months of school all I wanted was more.
Even when it was hard I was still kind of bored.
I'd broken my knee and still passed all my tests,
Not until lights and sirens were there pains in my chest.
In the back of headquarters is where I resided
Till a call thats not mine was where I collided.
You don't get prepared to see crumpled up kids,
Nor do you have the words when they shut the eyelids.
You stare into space when medics fake compressions,
Due to family onlookers with wide eyed expressions.
You say they'll be fine though their bloods on the floor,
You curse at your dispatch as you walk out the door.
You go home to your babies and you rock them to sleep,
You wake in a sweat, you think way too deep.
You call out of work from panic attacks,
Heart rate 150? There's an adavan for that.
You stay up 30 hours and could sleep on the ground,
You adapt to anticipate certain lung sounds.
Your noodles go cold from an untimely call,
Your surprised if you head back to quarters at all.
Once you've seen enough it's a lonely existence,
You can't tell everyone, you grow used to the distance.
Well intentioned empathy just isnt enough.
You just keep it moving, regardless how tough.
I felt your calling and oh I still do.
Doesn't matter how battered or beaten, how blue.
Give me your ailing, your tortured and raped.
Let me be a bridge in that distance, agape.
Let me bandage your wounded, be your transport at three.
Level with psychosis, let my proof set them free.
I once was lost and my soul depressed.
Now a purpose feuls me, though it burns up my chest.
I'm a lost and found pro but I still try my best,
I knew way back when. I belonged in EMS.
