by Brenda Aug 14, 2017
category :
Friendship, family /
family
I'm failing at bonding |
by CJ Maleney
Judging comment |
Dear Brenda my heart goes out to you please dont beat yourself up. You did the best you could and some more. I have a daughter like that I love her bit I keep my distance for my own sake |
by Brenda
Dagmar, thank you so much for strength and kind thoughts. I felt your Hugs! I'm figuring out the best way to deal with him and not lose my mind. |
Sending hugs and love. I am not a mother so I cannot possibly begin to understand, but I have respect and appreciate all mothers who do the best they can with what they're given. It hit home when you talked about mental illness as well because that heavily affects one side of my family and it's hard... my mom helps out a lot (as much as she can living in another state). There are some day it seems simple, and other times, I know my mom gets beyond frustrated. I know, just from seeing how hard she tries, that there's a lot of guilt but that in the end, my mom has to focus on her self-care and realize she can't do everything in the world. |
by Brenda
Thank you so much for your inspiring and kind words. I'm trying to find a way to accept and understand him more without losing myself in the process. He's back in therapy right now and I hope that gives him more tools to deal with the day to day stresses. Hugs back to you and your family and the struggles you all are facing yourselves. |
by Sai
As a daughter, I can't imagine making my mother feel this way. Sometimes we feel like everything we've done (all the sacrifices and such) is still not enough, but that doesn't mean it really is. I'm sure writing this poem down helped ease those self-doubts and disappointments. Loved reading this, all the best. |
by Brenda
Sai, thank you! Some of what he does, he knows better, other stuff, I know it's his illness. There's where my quandary lies, I hate when I feel aggravated and crazy when some of the simplest things arent done, ie; flushing the toilet....to me that's a common courtesy. I'm at an age where I don't have to clean up after kids, unless it's the grandbabies. Then I feel like crud because I am not being more understanding, this is where as a parent I feel like a huge failure, hence the write. |
by Mark
This is a very moving poem. It conveys your emotions and situation really well. 'Pills of my eternal happiness' is a particularly moving line. Well done. |
by Brenda
Mark, thank you! Yeah, my pills of eternal happiness have gotten me through a lot. They help smooth those road bumps. |