I Paid The Cost

My eyes are drowned in tears
My body equipped with fears,
Fears of losing what I have already lost
But at last, I have paid the cost

No amount of words can set me free
Than conceding a losing spree
No! Not yet, ain’t going to dust
For all I know, I have already paid the cost

Loving was an exceptional thing
I never looked out for what it might bring
My shield was less strong and rust
Couldn’t protect myself, so I paid the cost

I’m like a dead man who still has a second chance
But this time, no music could make me dance
The fun box in my head is burst
As a result I paid the cost

My eyes are closed but couldn’t sleep
My body were energize with pains
It’s hot and hurt in deep
I guess I ate a bitter cane
But am not hoping for the worst
All because I have already paid the cost

The End!
©17/01/2015 by M.E???

I remember how i struggled with a wanting bleeding pen in my hand to write this poem...
It was Jan, 17....My Birthday....oh! So soon, I've forgotten how i felt on that supposed special evening that was ruined by someone who was so special to me..........
Okay, , , below was our conversations that day when she showed up.... Yeah, she's my girlfriend and my first love ever.

She: i can't do this anymore
Me; do what exactly?????
She: this relationship needs to end
Me; what? On my birthday? What's wrong with you?
She: I'm pregnant
Me; oh! Don't tell me this conversation is getting worst, because its been months since we........
She: yes! It's not for you, it's for Osa and I've tried my best to abort it but the pregnancy refused to be aborted and also the doc told me to keep it or i might lose my life trying to abort it.
Me; tell me this whole thing is a prank and you're joking. Please!
She: am sorry
Me.......(sat down on the floor and started crying like a 2weeks old baby)
She: am so sorry.... I gotta go (she left)

I got angry and sick, I've never cried like that before in my life.....
It took me 5months to forget her and be myself again.

The thing is that, i was warned by family and closed friends that i should stay away from her, but i never listenened to any because i truly love her, but at the end i paid the cost, yes i was stripped off my emotions, something that am still trying to get back now so that i could love someone the way i should.........this days, i don't really go in...

Its 2yrs and counting, she gave birth to a girl and Osa never cared...hahahha
Such ix Life.
Thanks for reading.