I wasn't going to
Write this for you,
But this is something that
I have to get off my chest
Before I show you the door.
Do you really want to know
why I decided to tell you today
That this was it?
Let me give you some context.
These emotions that
I am about to present
were bottled up inside of me,
ever since I found out that
you dated someone literally the morning after
I dropped you off after
we went out on a date.
And hey,
maybe I missed the signals,
but I thought holding hands
Everywhere we went,
And making out
with someone multiple times
on a day out meant that
we were gonna be a thing.
But nah,
I didn't even find out
that you was in a
relationship with someone else
through you.
In fact,
I tried reaching out to you
that entire week
to no avail.
MY FRIEND told me about it.
Then you ghosted me
for a long time,
until out of nowhere
you hit me up
asking for money.
Yes,
I understand that you're in rehab.
Yes,
I understand that you have
a limit on social media.
Totally.
I get that.
BUT,
YOU TOLD ME that
we were gonna go out
the next day.
And I hit you up
that ENTIRE DAY,
only to get no response.
So I felt like I got stood up.
Another thing I have been noticing
was that whenever you are online,
you hardly ever interact with me,
but you do so with other people.
Which I get it,
I'm not the only
person in the world
to you.
But I never got any closure
As to if whether or not
What we had was special.
Nor did I get any closure
as to why you flaked,
UNTIL ABOUT A MONTH LATER.
So to sum up:
seeing you go from
one guy to the next,
Only to see you stay with them
As long as your eyeliner lasts;
providing me false hopes
of potentially meeting up again,
Maybe even rekindling what we
Started that fateful day,
only to flake on me
at the last minute;
And asking me for money
out of the blue,
and then ghosting on me,
while CLEARLY responding
to other people,
makes me feel suspicious.
This makes me feel like
I'm not important at all to you.
And seeing you just recently
Reach out to me,
after you are threatened
with me not wanting
Anything to do with you anymore,
only confirms my suspicions
that all I ever was to you
was your little back burner boy,
the one that you can get come back
when you are bored from
Boyfriend number X.
And I hate,
I despise,
Being the second option.
No.
Today is the day
where I finally
put my foot down.
So I'm sorry.
But you don't even know
that I too was hurting emotionally
all of these months.
And every time
I see you,
It hurts me.
Because I never had any closure
if whether or not
what happened that day
had any meaning to you at all.
I have no closure,
sufficient enough such
that I can finally move on
With my life.
So that's why I'm saying
That we are done.
At least you know why now.
And to be quite frank with you,
I really really don't need
to have you here anymore.
Know that if you need anything,
You know where to find me.
