I don't have you

Weird how you think I'm over this
you have no idea how much your missed
but I didn't show it
I figured you wouldn't care
your the one who got rid of me remember
I could never forget you
we used to be so close
now every little thing
is a memory of what I used to have
a friendship I thought would never end
but then you walked out of my life
slamming the door in my face
I was and still am so hurt
I didn't even want to deal with it
going through the same shit
with my old two best friends
in not even a month
I hate that your upset
but excuse me for not feeling sorry for you
what have you lost
a friendship
that you yourself ended
I don't understand I guess
I wish I could say
that the pain gets less and less
but that would be a lie
and I can't deny
that I'm covering it up
trying to let go
but I can't forget
my head and my heart won't let me
and every time I think of how much it hurts
I'm reminded of you
and how we joked about it hurting right here
and I'd touch my throat
we'd laugh and you'd say
"thats not where your heart is"
but I don't have that anymore
all of out little inside jokes
ya they were corny
but I loved everyone of them
and I don't have that anymore
starting over new
because now
I don't have you