My terms.

by arsalan   Mar 11, 2018


Tender yet rigid is the rope which I hold
Full of faces, dreams and places this noose I tie
This life thing is tiring, and I'm getting old
Nobody's there to cut this old hangman loose
The chair is squaky, it has had better days
The floor is creacking, it has been walked on by many legs
I've lived a life of which many will never know
I'm wise enough now to know when it's time to go
And as my tired feet push this old chair away
As the hangman's noose pulls on my tired neck
A beautiful smile grows on my cracking face
For a wise man once said: "Do not go gentle when it's time to go"
And I die on my own terms, and not those of cancer's.

We've been studying "do not go gentle into that good night" in class and, I thought what if an old man, ridden with cancer, decides to take that to heart, and go on his own terms.
Reason this is 13 lines, not 14, is because, well, it IS a poem about suicide and going on your own terms, so I thought it'd be a nice play on structure to have it cut short than the standard 14 lines. Thing is though, I dont know what, but there's something wrong with it, I can't quite put my finger on it but the more i read it the more something sounds off, any thoughts?

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Latest Comments

  • 6 years ago

    by Kitty Cat Lady

    Hi Arsalan :-) The beauty of poetry is that you can make it what you like with regards to structure. I like your reasons for not having an even number of lines, as well as your inspiration for this piece. I don't think there's anything 'wrong' with it (other than a couple of spelling errors) ... and you've done really well to put yourself in the mind of an old man, making his choice about how and when he goes. As for the title ... 'my terms'? 'noose by choice'? 'die hard'? :-) x
    =^.^=

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