My Fault

These were not my mistakes
Yet I feel guilty
Like I pushed you to do it
Why do I feel filthy?

Thinking about you with them
I'm not good enough
You do it over and over again
Why can't I give you up?

I let you in to deceive me
With my trust recharged
Trying not to feel the hurt
Even though my heart is charred

I can't help but feel it's all on me
Was I not satisfying you?
What am I missing in all of this?
I keep searching for clues

I am losing it here
Were you just looking for a screw?
But you got that from me
When you were getting it from them, too

Were they prettier than me?
Did they have something you craved?
Was it about control?
How did you become so depraved?

I just wanted your love
Could I have been too selfish?
The worst part of it is
I was hardly mad, more jealous

Why did they get to have you?
Why did I have to share my King?
Why couldn't it be just me,
When all I wanted was to be your Queen?