In Too Deep

by CJ Maleney   May 1, 2018


Twisted crumpled sheets,
Duvet kicked to the floor.
Not the aftermath of passion,
But the sign of an inner war.

Half remembered dreams,
Caused by memories I'll keep.
Thoughts that twist and turn
When I close my eyes to sleep.

Subconscious now fully in control,
In the war zone of my mind.
The innocents the casualties,
The ones we leave behind!

In no man's land I wander
Between what was and what may be.
Thoughts pushed below the surface
Come swimming from the deep.

Ripped from sleep and wide awake,
Body drenched in sweat.
Some aspects float and linger,
Some quickly to forget.

So In too deep that I can't sleep
I wake each night from broken dreams.
My chest compressed so I can't breath,
From thoughts of her that never leave.

    report violation
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Latest Comments

  • 6 years ago

    by Lost One

    Judge's Comment

    A dark, descriptive, and deeply relatable series of quatrains drew me "in too deep" to CJ Maleney's nightmares this week. I don't know if it was the relatability or the artfully engaging rhymes that kept me coming back to this poem, but something about it made me change my votes this morning that I had already decided on last night.

  • 6 years ago

    by Fredy RoMa0u Sanchez

    Amazing poem, very relatable

    • 6 years ago

      by CJ Maleney

      Thank you, glad you liked it.

      Craig

  • 6 years ago

    by Phoenix ¥

    A lovely poem which is very easy to relate to. Great flow x

  • 6 years ago

    by Lost One

    It's a war zone I often visit myself. I wish there were a pill to take for a dreamless night because I'd gladly buy a lifetime supply. Whether it's being plagued at night by what ifs, what was, what could never be, or just reliving moments best left dead in the past, this piece is all too relatable for me.

    • 6 years ago

      by CJ Maleney

      Yup I would buy those too.

      Regards

      Craig

  • 6 years ago

    by Kitty Cat Lady

    Craig this is really brilliant with echoes of your service years throughout that serve just as well metaphorically as they do literally. :-) x
    =^.^=

    • 6 years ago

      by CJ Maleney

      Thank you.

      It didn't start out with a military theme it just kinda unfurled that way.

      Craig x

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