Your last message

by Walter   May 27, 2018


I just love these romantic evenings
That I want to share with you
I have been patiently anticipating
With the dishes I've cooked just for two

I haven't talked to you since yesterday
So I hope that you didn't forget
Though I can't imagine you ever would
There must be a reason you're not here yet

I remember you saying how busy
You have been at your own work place
Since your co-worker left a while ago
And they've found no one else to replace

I'll send you a text just to remind you
In case it has slipped your mind
A few words with love hearts and kisses
Just so you know that my message is kind

Thinking of you has made me smile again
Now that I know that you'll be here soon
Two candles are lit and now flickering
With our low setting view of the moon

I now begin to set all the dishes
Making sure everything is placed just right
And I put on your favourite music
Only for us to dance through the night

And then I receive your delayed message
My phone lights up to you when it pings
You're late but will try to be home quickly
That's when I hear the front door bell ring

I can't help to smile as I open the door
While I hold the phone still in my hand
But it's not you who I see standing there
A police woman and I don't understand

She has that emotional look to her
And I instantly know something is wrong
Her lips quiver and she can't even tell me
But I know what she's trying to prolong

My tears begin to fall down my face
And I have never ever felt so alone
She can't help but look at my trembling hand
As I hold your last words on my phone

Time of death was your last message
Just after you finished and pressed send
In an instant two lives are now destroyed
My life without you has come to an end

    report violation
5


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Latest Comments

  • 6 years ago

    by Milly Hayward

    Walter a well rhymed piece. A tale that gently flows then ends on a twist and with a valid message
    that reminds us all of the perils of texting at the wheel. It still staggers me to see people still with phones to their ears whilst driving despite the publicity about it breaking the law. Well done on an excellent piece of writing that also helps to raise awareness of this issue and the potential repurcussions. Best wishes Milly x

    • 6 years ago

      by Walter

      Thanks very much Milly for your comment and you're right on how many people still are so blind to this while driving. Problem is they are blind to everything else as well. All the best :)

  • 6 years ago

    by Em (marmite)

    Walter this is a very hard hitting and painful write to read because it happens all too often and usually the people drinking/texting and driving don't actually die it's others who are infact at the wrong place at the wrong time who do... I couldn't imagine witnessing this wreckage or being the police constable who told the beloved that their loved one isn't coming home tonight and all for what?not taking a few extra seconds to pull over and answer a message or to leave the message until they got home?? There's nothing worse in my eyes than using a mobile or drink/drug driving... Anyway your piece was really well rhymed, I have to admit a little it loses it's way but you get it back and it doesn't take away the fact that all in all it's a really great piece.
    Take care

    • 6 years ago

      by Walter

      Thank you Em for your detailed comment and I couldn't agree with you more. It's not often that the culprits are the victims rather than other innocent bystanders but even with this scenario it makes it difficult for the people dealing with the aftermath.

  • 6 years ago

    by Mahesh Kachare

    Best poem really. Well written.

    • 6 years ago

      by Walter

      Much appreciated and thanks Mahesh!

  • 6 years ago

    by Anamika Patil

    very nice poem. wow!

    • 6 years ago

      by Walter

      Many thanks Anamika! :)

  • 6 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Hello Walter.

    I enjoyed this poem. I must admit, I never saw the ending the way you described it. I thought it would she would just not turn up because she didn't love you. The opposite was, in fact, true.

    This is not just a well told story, but a message to those of us who use our phones whilst driving. It's dangerous and like in your poem, people die from doing so.

    Well done.

    • 6 years ago

      by Walter

      Thanks very much for your comment Mr.Darcy. I wanted the ending to be unexpected as much as the victims who use their phones are totally unaware that this could and does happen in an instant.

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