Trapped

I don't want to be here..
But I don't want to die.

Why does it feel,
Like I'm living a lie.

I have all that I need,
But I still don't know why.

I can't be happy,
No matter how hard I try.

Yes, I'm depressed..
I'm clearly a mess .

But that doesn't stop me,
From still getting dressed.

To take on the day,
No matter how hard.

Even if I wanna run away,
I wouldn't get far.

I've done that to long,
I've held back the tears.

I've been nothing but strong,
Is there something I fear?

Alone with my thoughts,
Talking to myself .

Is there something wrong with me,
Should I go get help ?

My mind isn't here,
I ask where did it go ?

Still waiting for my answer,
I keep traveling down the road.

Like maybe I need to get out,
Smoke a blunt,
Drive all about.

Let my troubles go free,
With every puff that I breathe.

Let the window down,
To escape the sound..

That scatters through,
my aching brain.

Will the sun ever shine,
Or will I be trapped in the rain?