Comments : Poetry in the youth

  • 6 years ago

    by MoonMaiden

    This totally deserves a nomination !

  • 6 years ago

    by Michael

    Fenrir,

    I really enjoyed your piece here, and such an inspiration to fellow poets :)
    Just a couple of things "interest a them" - 2nd line/2nd verse take out "a them"?
    "like a drip of water, occasionally find interest like the water occasionally falls" - this is quite a mouth full, so maybe " like drips of water, that occasionally fall"? Maybe? see what you think.
    But well done all the same
    Michael :)

    • 6 years ago

      by Blank

      Thank you michael, your feedback is much appreciated.
      I didn't even realise the mistake I made with "a them", it meant to be just them.
      And I definetly like your "like drips of water, that occasionally fall." Better.
      Take care.