Comments : From the End

  • 6 years ago

    by Darren

    This is great, nice imagery and flow.
    Gets you thinking and reading again.

    however, because I am a bit of a picky sod, I would replace the word 'sight' in line 5, purely because you have already used it in line 3.
    You could swap it out for

    emergence
    appearance
    arrival
    aroma
    aura
    view

    etc

    that being said, this is only a suggestion, it is your poem after all.
    ;-)

    • 6 years ago

      by Hope

      thank you