It can too

My nerves are shot.
I’m distressed and I’m hurting;
So bad to the point that I almost gave in and cut myself last night.
The urges are rare these days-
It takes a lot for me to want to go back to that but once again I’m coming up on my year clean mark and no matter how strong the temptation;
I wasn’t doing it.
Some people will never understand the messed up logic of it-
But it’s a complicated thing and the so called “logic” of it isn’t really logic at all.
It’s more of focusing on a different kind of pain-
The relief of feeling yourself hurt physically because you’re hurting emotionally.
Physical wounds heal but emotional wounds can last a really long time and all I wanted-
was to focus on feeling like something that is broken on me or in me can heal.
But you see I’m not broken.
I’m only hurting;
And I would give up everything I have in my life that means the most to me
before I ever let someone hurt me to the point
of where I feel like hurting myself is the only outlet again.
Despite the words being thrown my way all the time from someone else;
You have always told me that everything will
pass no matter how bad it is and that sticks with me every single day-
So if my pain from the past can pass,
My hurt in the present surely can too.