Woah, this was hard hitting and emotional and raw, plus a hundred other things. As someone who's struggled with their faith and didn't understand the violent, persistent ways of suicidal thoughts... it's hard trying to find logic in our pain. It's truly remarkable how the human spirit can still strive despite not being able to see the light, not knowing why we keep putting a foot forward. But we do. Perhaps there is a sort of resilience in us that we do not yet fully realize.

The "holiest of men" was extremely thought-provoking. At first, I thought of that line as a criticism against God, his omnipotence only causing more suffering instead of relief and healing. Then it also makes me think of the good we do as stewards on this earth. How it can seem even the best and most compassionate people are the ones punished... and we never know why.

I hope this was cathartic to write and I'm glad to see this nominated, as there's something incredible about writing without a filter and letting the emotions be released on the page.

Welcome to this site. Hope to see more of your poetry :)