by D.
The last stanza is stunning in many ways. A great command of language, and I enjoyed the more concrete imagery you depicted here. I find the first part a little too wordy in places, but that is not so much as a criticism as a personal comment. I always feel when trying to capture a ‘real’ idea, as opposed to a fantasy one, it’s nicer to use narrative, concrete language. This poem proves it for me, powerfully ended but formerly subdued in some ways. I always enjoy your poetry, and there’s really something here for everyone. Awesome :) |
by Maple Tree
Thank you Danny! |
I want to wrap you up in a hug after reading this! I felt the surge of emotions in this, of exhaustion, of a soul aching. |
by Maple Tree
Hugs you MA |
Wow! |
by Brenda
A lot of pain in these words, but also catharsis in putting these words into paper. We need to purge these feelings and hopefully by doing this you begin to heal. Hugs my friend- |
Great write... i love the way you weaved the words and how you make us feel the pain..I agreed with Brenda,after all the pain we need to heal.. |
Straight from the heart and the truth well spoken. I give you prompts in every aspect and the school of life is a never-ending journey. We do the best we can as a parent and the how part is something else. You are a great inspiration to so many and my heart goes out to you. Keep strong. Hugs |
Judge's Comment: |