Comments : Rusalka (The Water Nymph)

  • 5 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    I don't care how much you've won recently, if this isn't on the front page come Monday, I will be positively mystified, good man! A wonderful, spellbinding write.

    Take care and all the best.

  • 5 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Wonderful inspiration for a piece of creative writing. As Ben said, this deserves to win.
    Well done.

    • 5 years ago

      by D.

      Thank you guys! Means a lot. This one took a while to write :’)

  • 5 years ago

    by Milly Hayward

    Loved this piece. Full of imagery and mystic. Milly x

  • 5 years ago

    by Hellon

    I really enjoyed this one Danny and, although the story is different it reminded me of a song from long before you were even born :)

    https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=the+balled+of+cursed+anna

  • 5 years ago

    by Larry Chamberlin

    Daniel,
    Magnificent! I had long wanted to commemorate rusalki but you have done it so much better than I could hope to I feel satisfied with your work.
    You might find great joy in the Rusalka trilogy by C. J. Cherryh.

    • 5 years ago

      by D.

      Thank you Larry! I will be sure to. I spent a long time looking at some shorter synopsises before I wrote it. Was kind of transfixed by the lore behind it!

  • 5 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    This is so mystical and alluring yet it's a
    sad story....nicely penned and I liked it
    very much. Congrats non the win!

  • 5 years ago

    by The Poet Behind The Poems

    I can see why this truly striking piece won...
    I mean it's hard to take an original idea and truly make it your own. They are suspected to be a sort of evil mermaid in modern culture but anyway..

    towards the lady perched
    naked, upon the rocks;
    unmatted auburn curls
    draped over her breasts,

    This was the stranza that made it for me the images the words everything just hits you.

    Stunning.

  • 5 years ago

    by sammiej

    I think you have the seasons wrong in this poem, you contradict yourself in nearly every line if it’s Sludgy it’s not green. you say the morning then you talk about it being dark! and then you talk about the marshes come on mate you’re good at criticising other peoples work look at your own. ????part from That you have an imagination

    • 5 years ago

      by D.

      It feels like you were looking for things to criticise here. I didn’t once say it was morning. I compared her song with a morning bird. :) with regards to the vocabulary used, I don’t understand how greens and browns are impossible colours given the setting? There are differences between swamps, bogs, marshes, I know. I simply used them here as synonyms. The reader isn’t stupid - they can imagine this scene pretty well.

      There’s a difference between constructive criticism and this comment, I hope you realise.

  • 3 years ago

    by Xaque

    The writer created very colorful and detailed world and led me through it with an engaging flow, especially the sequence "swirl,/ come,/ a kiss,/ an embrace," My favorite stanza was "as mayflies dance/ upon the carcasses, the /tips of her toes stir /the skin of the lake," It immersed me into the poem.