I was in the Room

I stood in the corner
of a pitch, dark room;
barefoot on blue carpet
digging my toes in so deep
that a burrow hideout was
noticeable- and you did not see me.

I felt a cold draft coming through
cracks of your old house, freezing
my confusion, labeling this tragedy
I was soon to see; Your eyes grew holes
where life used to be.

I felt gunpowder splatter, mixed
with the sweat of your brow; crossing
my face as shock left me numb,
the day I lost my hearing.

Taking your own life that day
broke my skeletal frame into
a million sharpened nails,
you were never alone.

Your death has left me
lonely in hearing loss,
gutted as my oldest fights
to live, and angry.

I am that child in the corner-

A woman with a hole in the middle of her soul;

and you never noticed until after you pulled the trigger.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Suicide-You may end your suffering, but you pass on the suffering
to the ones you left behind.

20 years ago, my Grandfather took his life, I was 28 years old.