Family (WIP)

by Aearion   May 28, 2019


Family a important word
Some share a life of love
Others my not and fall into despair
Me myself I may feel so lucky
A family of friends it is never a bore

Seasons come and seasons go
Passing us by with out a thought
But family will never go
Forever changing but always the same

First comes spring weather rain or shine
With my family its always bright

Summer sun may be hot
Dry weather usually brings out the fun
With my family there is always sun

Then it's autumn fall to most beautiful but dead
Rain may come in as the sun goes out
Trees may die and leaves will fall
With my family everything seems to be alive

Then at last winter will come
Days again may get colder maybe rain maybe snow
Most animals sleep not on the prowl
People stay in warm fire warm clothes
With my family we still party always having fun.

( I have not finished this poem, I was gonna make a family video with my poem but was not sure how this went. it has been forever since I did poems but always willing to take a few pointers. If i get this finished I will post the final piece.)

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Latest Comments

  • 5 years ago

    by Milly Hayward

    I agree with Mr Darcy I can imagine this with a back drop of family images being a perfect gift. I also like the going through seasons and reiterating how wonderful it is despite the different seasons to be with family. Looking forward to seeing the finished product. Best wishes Milly x

  • 5 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Any poem is helped with visuals. Your seasonal poem about family would work well on the screen. I'm sure you'd use family videos and photos. It would make a great Christmas gift to them.
    Good luck.

  • 5 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Hello, I like the 'family is important and a constant positive' message. Using the seasons as a similie, or at least showing how unpredictable seasons can be compared to the love of a great family.
    There's a few typos, but with your edits I'm sure it'll turn out ok.
    Nice job so far.

    • 5 years ago

      by Aearion

      Thank you for the nice review. I always have typos but sadly... I am not the best when it comes to that stuff.. But IT is as I said WIP. I am trying to make a family video and want to add on to it... but I was not sure if I felt this poem was the right one.. But others say its good So I may continue it.

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