Who is Playing the Music

by ddavidd   Jun 23, 2019


It makes no sense:
Who does play the music,
where there is nothing but silence
to the rim of the horizon,

nothing but hoofs of dust's trample
in stillness,

where the serpents of curvity are quelled
by straight lines,
and musical notes
halt all their twirls
except across the spider webs
that spread in sobriety?

Lament of music quietly are
crawling the distance.
Mirages are
trenching in my parched lips.
Jaz is yawning mutely
in the stray dogs'
indolent stretches
of these shapes.

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Latest Comments

  • 5 years ago

    by ddavidd

    I guessed it that is commonly a verb. Thank you so much for the useful explanation.

  • 5 years ago

    by D.

    I find it hard to catch up with your poetry Bob. So prolific!

    I always enjoy your writing - such elegance and confidence with language. There are seldom errors in wording but I applaud your experimentation, and truly believe you are among the most interesting writers on this site. A tad wordy towards the end, this poem is all about some beautiful moments in vocabulary:

    ‘Hoofs’, ‘quell’, ‘lament’, ‘mutely’

    You truly are a fan of the ‘l’ sound. I am too. It’s possibly the Latin influence.

    Grammatically, towards the end, it should be:

    Lament(ations) of music (are) quietly crawling the distance.

    This is a gorgeous piece, that begs the reader to question movement and sound in the vacuity of space. Well written as ever, Bob.

    • 5 years ago

      by ddavidd

      Thank you for your compliment and your always honest criticism. You are one of the very very few little groups of people around here who I always enjoy reading their criticism Of my work. Firstly because they are the only people who write criticism, (as maturely as this one) second because they often know what they are talking about.
      I always implement your corrections, because your mastery of the language is envious and respected by me. English is my second language. (I write a little better in my language) But here, Lament is not only a verb. I used it as a noun. Definition of the lament as a noun: A feeling or expression of grief; a lamentation. ( the Free Dictionary ~online~
      If I am missing something, please advise me.

    • 5 years ago

      by D.

      Ah okay, if it’s singular then it would be ‘a lament’ if speaking generally, or ‘the lament’ if you’re talking about there only existing one. If it’s a plural, ‘lamentations’ just sounds better than ‘laments’. I hope that helped! Without an article/pronoun, I always read ‘lament’ as a verb.

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