Comments : It Was Not Bravery

  • 4 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Daniel, great to read a new poem from you. This is a truly emotive write and one i wish I could nominate but the site won't let me at this time on a Saturday.
    My only gripe would be the repetition of 'us' in line 3 and 'outside' at the end, however, I am aware you are too gifted a writer to have simply not seen that so I suppose that ultimately means it comes down to personal choice/taste.

    I do hope you are keepig well in these troubled times.

    Ben

    • 4 years ago

      by D.

      Haha, thank you Ben but you give me too much credit! I did not notice the ‘outside repetition. Thank you, though, for being on the ball as always.

      Hope you and yours are well.

  • 4 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    You're back! I know it's only been a few months but I've missed you and your poetry.

    Everything flowed so softly in this. I felt a surge of calm. I also completely understood the "lonely but not alone" line. I think that differentiation is important.

    I loved how I could connect this to our current situation many are facing, but it also felt personal, poetic and more contemplative... the question of freedom, the definition of bravery. I also liked how you started with saying it might kill you, meeting, but it might not. I felt like that gave a little lift, a little hope. A little reassurance that this will not be the end of the world. That you can still be close in other ways. Perhaps the yearning, the "I miss you", will strengthen your bond.

    The choice of the word "bravery". Saying it's not brave. Maybe others will think it foolish, but we have to continue to live our lives, though maybe in altered ways for awhile. We can connect, just be smart about it. We cannot always fear the world. This felt like a "bigger picture" poem than only being about this pandemic. I connected with it on the level of also getting outside of ourselves, allowing ourselves to taste the anticipation of facing a storm, not shutting ourselves. There's always risk. There won't always be time though to do everything we want.

    Lovely <3

    • 4 years ago

      by D.

      Thank you! It’s great to post something again. I’ve missed your comments and thoughts, and everyone else’s poetry here. Your insight was 100% spot on as always. Thank you again :)

  • 4 years ago

    by Star

    I missed your poetry too, sooo good to read something new!!!

    This does feel like it has been inspired by the world status these days.
    I love how the poem ended swallowing the key then knowing that it's not bravery. But I feel like there is doubt, like you're still questioning yourself.

    • 4 years ago

      by D.

      Thanks Star. :)
      It was definitely inspired by the world status - more notably the one between my partner and I, who are in different countries at the moment. The doubt is questioning which is the right decision. It's kind of cliché, but most of it pertains to the current & constant uncertainty.

      Hope you're well. :)