by Vanessa Apr 21, 2020
category :
Miscellaneous /
Misc. poems
There are those that are not willing to confess it is somehow a disgrace to all the rest dishonoring those that were the best damming the blessed damn what a mess this world is outrageous these Warriors courageous their Valor said to be contagious but yet still on blood-stained Battleground spacious their enemies remain forever nameless ran through by Blades of Steel stainless they are not Shameless but neither are they blameless the dreams are deemed less because people can't picture fields of greenness leaving dreamers dreamless braveness equals dire graveness because yet another ignoramus is made famous by intentions heinous we are lost to corrupt traditions ageless our future wasted all of us sinners faithless Chased by these ghosts of ours that are faceless and this hell we created keeps time that is fadeless God remains so gracious even when we keep sidestepping our destined greatness and all of our passions are burned out they are flameless achievements frameless fruits of our labor by our efforts gainless this world seems to be carried by the brainless this can not substain us villains Reckless leaving behind collateral damage careless vulnerable we cannot be covered by our barrenness this world's not remembered for fairness ego should be deflated our countries morals debated suicide is not painless as some have stated so why are these murders premeditated self-medicated half ass sedated moments that were wasted but they look as though they were cherished through eyes that were jaded stupid are those that appeared educated our enemies so underestimated Our Saviors belated good people hated cutting ties to the ones in which they are related Civilization degraded how we long for that familiar sameness they said comes from saneness the world is an outrageous mess for forgotten faces found in Peyton's places Out Of Reach of God's good graces some of these bodies disappeared with no traces they ended up in an oasis could be nothing more than a fabled burial ground of wasted spaces. |
There's passion in this, and I love the continuation of words in each line that ended with "ness" or "less". My thinking is that this was more of a freewrite, so I'm guessing it may have been your intention for it to read without any breaks or pauses... I will say it was a bit hard to read at first, and maybe the flow would be better with a few natural breaks, but that's just my opinion. |
by Vanessa
Thank you for the kind words and constructive cristism |