i wish i could nominate this!

Your words are beautiful. There is an aura around this poem that hits home with me that i understand all too well. I generally don't like too many stop and starts but i think they work well here because they allow the poem and the reader themself to breath in the last line read. It hits you like a lightning strike. The first line is everything honestly.

You learned of warmth finally after perhaps months or years of hiding it. It tells me that you had this chilling experience in the past and it has always stuck with you, even when there was a little bit of happiness.

The word play here is excellent. They really bring the poem up and you did well to say what you meant.

There is one thing i caught though. I noticed that the whole poem is in present tense. And i feel like in the 6th line "I froze" could read as "i freeze" because it feels like as the reader i am caught in the moment not the past.

I can't wait to read more of your poems