I wish I didn't care, so I pretend not to,
but it's hard to deny that I feel so many emotions
when it comes to thinking of you.
I used to crave for you to be on my side,
to believe me over him if the truth came out,
but that turned into numbness,
then into not wanting you to care at all.
Love should have no twist of rules,
but with his as your lover, you don't need an enemy;
yet I don't want you as a friend.
When will you realise that it's too late,
you can't keep trying to break my wall down,
hoping that I'll forgive you for crashing into my life
like you were all I ever wanted.
I no longer hide the truth,
for I no longer fear what reaction you will have.
I am no longer fearful of the destruction he promised me,
I am no longer fearful of him.
I am not angry because you chose to not believe me,
but there is anger inside my thoughts,
because how true can your love be
when he has betrayed you my entire life of knowing you.
I don't feel sad because I miss you,
sadness is there because I know what you could have has instead of him.
But now you can touch this space between us and feel it burn,
knowing you will never be close to me again.
You can walk alone now,
you have lost me and you appear to have lost him too, for now.
Regret is not something I dwell on,
but I often want to ask if you have any doubts about the path you chose,
because you seem to be desperate and lonely,
and if you loo back on it all,
over all of those cold and lonely years,
