The Silent Attacks

I lay in my bed with this silence,
As most people are closing their eyes,
To go off to dream land,
But I'm not having dreams,
I'm having vivid nightmares,
They feel so real,
I can't tell what's real,
And what's fake,
Having the cold chills run down my back,
Me hearing gun shots go off in my head,
Me hearing screams left and right,
As if someone needs me to save them,
But I can't do anything but watch,
I feel glued down to the bed,
Scared of what's next,
Telling myself,
"Just go back to sleep",
"Its not real",
But as I shake and sweat out all my weight,
I just scream that I want it to end,
The voices need to stop,
The screams need to silence themselves,
The tears need to stop flowing,
This is what PTSD has done to me