Really like what you did with this. I'm very tired now and need to sleep but if I get some respite I'll revisit. If I do not, know I love this for it being what I call raw.

I love rhymes as many know and people think they are easy. Some are yet most are not. It's like trying to convey a thought process and at the same time maintain a flow. I imagine most song writers have the same issue.

What you have done with this is both simple and complicated at the same time. I've read it three times now and on each occasion it changes. I like it best when I slow it down (I read quickly) In doing so I find I can hang on to certain bits and they sink in better.

Fantastic write well done.

Regards

Craig

I enjoy reading this.

Vivid imagery