I long for you

by Everlasting   May 14, 2021


I long for you to be with me
like dew on grass at morning free
with sunshine rays above a hill
just you and I, in love so still
and yet as deep as bluest seas

but oh the winds, these winds you see
won’t let us be despite my plea
with squalls these winds come break my will
I long for you

You are as sturdy as a tree
with roots so strong you must agree
No wind can shake you. You are skilled.
The crickets chirp for you with thrill
Yet here I am down on my knees
I long for you

9


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Latest Comments

  • 3 years ago

    by Em

    Absolutely love this and glad it won the front page, how lovely and relatable.....'I long for thee '

  • 3 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    I long for you to win this week
    for poetry to sing yippee
    You did and I for one was pleased
    A form like this you wrote with ease
    Your win made me, today, happy!

    • 3 years ago

      by Everlasting

      I took the liberty of re-writing the above cheer! I hope you do not mind me. Just trying to fixed some of the hiccups to make it sound smoother. But I’m displeased with my “fixed” as I feel I made it lose its emotion.

      I longed for you to win this week
      for poetry to sing yippee
      You wrote a form like this with ease
      now both of us are truly pleased
      your win today has made me happy!

      Thank you!

  • 3 years ago

    by Keira Pickard

    I'm glad this won! Congratulations :)

  • 3 years ago

    by prasanna

    Beautiful. Congrats on the win!

  • 3 years ago

    by Keira Pickard

    Wonderful. The rhyme scheme was difficult to work out, but I eventually decided that it was:
    AABBA AABC AABBAC.
    It must have been extremely hard to write. I loved the repetition of rhyme throughout the poem and the thought of coming up with different words that all rhyme over and over.
    I loved the imagery in the opening lines.

    I long for you to be with me
    like dew on grass at morning free
    with sunshine rays above the hill

    ^^ the similie in this was really stunning to read, calming , with a beautiful picture. The idea of dew clinging to the grass in the way you cling to whoever you're describing in the poem was brilliant.
    All of it was truly lovely. I really loved this :)

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