Dreaming

My mother told me it’s best to not focus on the the things that I can’t control because it will take a heavy toll on my heart.

So ever since you left me, I dismiss you before you become a thought.

I fight my feelings a lot.

I ignore every empty spot.

Hoping you could be just a memory I forgot.

Except the truth finds a way when I’m asleep.

It lets out all the feelings I work so hard to keep.

I rarely dream but when I do, I am right back with you.

I wake up but I don’t want to.

You see reality is a nightmare.

Waking up to realize you aren’t actually there, is a pain I still can not bare.