Comments : Nothing will change…

  • 3 years ago

    by Em

    Hello Star,
    The title 'nothing will change…' made me think why won't anything change.. Is this like a leopard never changing their spots as in a liar or a chest won't change or is it something more than that...? All the same I was intrigued as to what wouldn't change and why. The '... ' added to the suspence.

    you take in
    one big breath
    your lungs
    reject the air,
    ^
    I love this opening and the imagery of lungs rejecting air as if they can just say "no, not todsy matey" I know it's more than that and I think this particular part is about gasping for breath due to an anxiety attack possibly?

    you feel their walls
    hardening
    like you took in
    some unknown
    chemicals.
    ^
    I like the idea of the lungs saying no to the air as it feels as though the air is unknown chemicals or worse known chemicals that have been purposefully inhaled anyways.

    the entire world
    for a second
    blacks out,
    you find your spirit
    letting out a big sigh.
    ^
    This makes me believe this is about an anxiety attack and the effects it has. I like the image of a soul sighing, it's beautifully sombre but truthful and relatable.

    you come back
    and there you are;

    in the same place
    and the same time.
    ^
    If only we could morph elsewhere when these blackouts happen ; possibly even a different era. I'd love to go back and see if the dinosaurs were real =)
    All in all, a heartfelt, realistic and relatable piece.
    Good luck for this week's comp,
    Em xx

    • 3 years ago

      by Star

      Well science says dinosaurs existed, and I believe in science ^_^
      Thank you Em, you’re very close to what I had in mind!

  • 3 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    This is my like my third time coming back to this poem, and each time, I feel the sadness throughout. The lungs rejecting the air makes me think of times where we want to survive, but feel as if everything is pushing us down. And it's all too much. Especially when our mental health is so low, but we're still holding on. When our brains seems to conspire against us, and every step forward is like a rebellious act. When I first read this, I almost saw it as a bitter realization that there will be no progress, no change, everything would remain stagnant. On the second and third read, it kind of reminds me of a book I read about agoraphobia. Wanting to challenge perhaps irrational thoughts, but also wanting safety and not wanting to compromise that. Maybe there's resignation and defeat in not being able to explore the great big world, but maybe there's also a sense of assurance in knowing that at least you are secure. Even if you can't take more than a few steps outside without the world closing in, without the panic, at least you are able to exist, no matter if it's limited space.

    Really liked the thought in this!

    • 3 years ago

      by Star

      You got me thinking about some things with this comment :)
      Thank you for coming back for this and commenting!!