Terrible things

I wake up to the four same walls again;
like the rest of us nowadays
though for me, it's one day closer to eviction,
losing my job has clearly taken its toll
and divorce proceedings do not help.

It's only 4.02am,
I think I've had about 30 minutes broken sleep
and I'm worrying what the day will bring
whilst walls close in around me,
I hold my breathe;

it helps a little
but I nearly lose consciousness
I'm unsure whether this is
due to lack of sleep
or nutrition.

At this moment I can't even stomach toast,
it seems to lodge itself in my disturbed* throat -
trying to tell me I have better things to do
with what little time I have left here.

Retching on toast and my own vomit,
I try and make myself look presentable -
throwing yesterday's shrewn clothes on.

©Em