I may be secretly addicted to cuddling with the darkness,
loving nothing because I can't lose someone else,
but it is not who I wanted to be.
I've been cuddling with fear for so long now
that happiness will never let me in.
I'm never happy with who I am when I see my reflection,
an ocean of loneliness drowning a child afraid to cry.
Even when the sun is shining,
I am burdened with the fear of suffocation of no progression.
If you see the real me, you will see
that I know nothing at all any more,
and my smile is so far from the truth
because no matter where life takes me
I will forever be this cold.
Until the coldness leaves,
I will staple a smile upon my face
pretend that yesterday doesn't matter,
and wish that it was always the best of me.
