See-through

I don't want to exist
I want to be a ghost
Watching those who remain among the living
Never in danger of rejection
Never in danger of failure

To simply exist and yet not
I want to ignore the fact
That I have flesh and bone
That I have a name and a face
That I have ... a home

I want to feel loved,
Somehow,
Without the danger
Of being known

A memory
The wisps of which
Float
Sadly
Above my loved one's heads

I am a whisper
A comfort that you feel
Not tangible
But present
And aching

I want to know for certain
That I have no place in this world
By leaving it
And watching from the other side
Of the stained glass window

To watch the scenes without me
Fill with happiness
So I can fade at last
And become as see-through as I feel

© Obscure 2021

(This was mostly just a vent, but I believe it qualifies as a poem as well)