When you held me, that first time,
Your arms embraced me so tight my pieces fell into place.
When you held me, under the moonlight,
For the first time in eternity, I felt my heart finally beat.
When you held me, as I slid to fall,
I remember you fear, as if I would break, and how much hat touched my soul.
When you held me, and we made love,
I never felt so warm and close with anyone as I had with you.
When you held me, as I whimpered in sickness,
I had never felt so safe, as you promised you would always protect me.
When you held me, as I had treatment for sickness,
I threw up at your feet, and you never minded, just rubbed my back and kissed my cheek, even if I were a mess.
When you held me, as I clawed at my skin, you never gave up,
From protecting me from myself at breaking point.
When you held me, when I screamed to go away, you melted my fears,
and all I could do is cry in your front and tell you I'm sorry (To which, you whispered you understood).
When you held me, even when I was stressed and mean, you melted my ice entirely, and I fell in love with you all over.
When you held me, when someone had made me afraid, I had never felt more loved, and cared for as I did with you.
When you held me, I never wanted to stop, your heart against mine, the heat of your body, breathing in your pure warmth
But the hugs, they began to be too tight..and hands that once held me began to leave marks, and your hugs lost their sweetness like they once did.
I still loved you...
When you held me, sometimes it meant pain, and sometimes it were so nice I forgot the marks. But I never forgot the fear..
When you held me, you stole my breath and I feared dying, but I never stopped telling you I loved you, even if you scared me.
When you last held me, I remember how scared I were, and how much holding me now meant *this*.
The day you last held me..Silver bracelets held your wrists..which turned into silver bars..because for my safety, you weren't allowed to hold me anymore.
Now you can't hold me, and although I am saddened, I think of those times that you did so in kindness, and I put on a brave face for the world that loves me.
Next time you hold me, and I don't know when that will be, I hope you'e learned to be gentler, and think of my pain and how fragile I am...But sadly..It is in a time I cannot foresee.
