My soul is genuinely tired;
My heart has been left on half empty for quite some time.
I’ve been searching for a safe space for as long as I can remember and-
Every time I find one it’s ripped right out from under me.
Nights spent in warm comforting arms and forehead kisses,
just for them to turn to cold shoulders and distance has a taken a toll on me.
Making a bedroom my own just to have to move into another space and leave everything behind-
Start over from scratch and try to find my place again,
Has been a detriment to me.
Jumping from work place to work place just to continuously end up in toxic environments rather than ones I should be thriving in has depleted me.
Giving everything I have to everyone I love and getting little to nothing in return;
Mending broken hearts just to have mine be destroyed in return,
Being a shoulder for a sobbing broken friend just to be annihilated in my own sorrow and grief face down bawling in a pillow alone at night-
Has obliterated me.
Genuine happiness for my friends just to be met with fake congratulations and jealousy when I make big accomplishments has been so isolating.
Being called resilient when I get back up bruised and broken is almost an insult.
I don’t want to be resilient anymore;
My soul aches.
My heart has been running in half empty for quite some time and-
I really really need a break.
