The devil we know is better than the devil we don’t;
And darling weren’t you just the most charming of them all?
Twisting words in such a hideously beautiful manner,
Making them favor you so that I would question my ability to trust my what i knew was happening.
You kept me like a promise but you broke me like one too and I;
Sadly, beautifully, tragically, let you do it to me.
I once asked my mother why we miss people who hurt us and-
In her wisdom and understanding she responded with “because they don’t ALWAYS hurt us”
Everyone stays for the good and so did I
But I also stayed because I was scared of what awaited me outside of our house.
Or maybe I was scared of seeing what would be left of me after everything you’ve destroyed.
Would I be a phoenix or a car crash?
Would I be beautiful?
Or tragic?
The remains of the girl I once was linger in the
back of my head like Taylor swift song lyrics on a rainy midnight drive-
Familiar and haunting.
I often wonder what she would think of me now,
She would probably kick me in the rear and tell me to collect myself
But she knows it’s easier said than done-
Old me went through it too.
Now both of us are stuck grieving for the girl we used to be and the woman we want to become but
still can’t quite reach that part of ourselves to do it.
The devil you know is better than the devil you don’t and darling;
I know you I just don’t know myself and that is what is so terrifying.
