Ebb n flow
Reactions
You go first
Holding the door open
Lessons from the elder
As if they know the trueness of the new age
The pain is real
Time passed
Never growing up
Speed bumps while maturing
Construction zone
Fines are doubled
Can they fix my brain for me
Or is the life I live hopeless
Destined for utter remorse
I live guilt free
But troubled
It’s not your problem
I guess both parties should be happy about that
But the uncertainty
Is daunting
Choose
Choice
What little room there is to choose
My brain
Damaged
Free
A momentum that truely can’t be stopped
Bashing around like a bull in a china shop
Will
What will will conjure
Actions
How well can I act
Wish
I wish
Help
Please
Ending up
Just carrying on towards the next hole in the wall
Fancy that
Wawh they really masked that one
Truth
As far as we can see
Lies
How long can they keep up this charade
Because it’s oh so hypnotizing
I can almost believe it
But the truth needs a way to stretch after a long night of dreams
I pray my hope endures and prevails
Things aren’t always this dreary
I do have moments of happiness pease and hope
But how could it be steady
With all these forces counteracting the pressure
How can my mind just not work
How can I leave what doesn’t work in the past
How can I explain that it’s not my fault
How can you believe I’m not my symptoms
How can you cheer when I’m busy falling short
How can you help without hurting me
I need a better outlet for sure
I need a perfect brain that extra 1% of the time
Because that small sliver of my nightmare
Brings so much trauma and so little joy
And I just want something I can trust
I trust myself more than anyone
Especially compared to the burden k carry
I want you to trust me
I do trust that the floor won’t up and leave the next step I take
But how can I be so sure