The Ordeal

I do not wish to live
but my mom's illness
makes me want to,
only in order to help her.

So life inertia in me
is unusual and inverted:
I just live for the love of one who is dying
and die on my own
while life force is thriving in me.

I love my mom to death.
I love her to live, I love her in order to live
to in my turn
die in peace.