Good to see you're still on here! You got me in the first line with "library throat", love that and it was unexpected and speaks so profoundly with the rest of what you've written. So much in here with self-worth too, plus the mention of forgiveness at the end. Eloquent and emotional as usual. There is always a depth and honesty in your pieces that feel extremely intimate, especially when reflecting on that lost love and a person's absence perhaps shaping you, taking up space in different ways in the present and future.