The cold shivered autumn
and her falling leaves,
could not come soon enough.
I had a dream about you,
but your dead universe swayed away from me
and expands with thunder in my heart.
The sun in my summer
does not warm this winter soul
or take away these memories
that tear me apart.
All the things I want
along with these wonderful
and terrible dreams ahead of me
won't wait on me anymore,
and neither will you.
I've dreamt of you for over a decade,
and I was no closer to letting you go.
I dodged and weaved
through the loneliness.
I've become your
impenetrable rock in this ocean
just to breathe in the sadness
through the endless nights of dying inside.
I did everything right, I stood by your side.
I stretched myself thin and now,
I get to see you leave in this
heartbreaking dream without ever saying goodbye.
Here I am
picking up the pieces again
walking in a circle of what seems like forever
scratching her name in my heart
convincing myself, it's okay to break
every rule and promise I made
to move on and forget.
You do this over and over again
until you wake up and believe
you were always made for her
and you finally became the
version she wanted you to be,
even when all you have
are fading memories
like water running down
your cold and tired hands.
I don't think you even know
you are damaged stuck in this wasteland,
surrounded by the dead trees of
all the sorrows and regrets that keep
you up at night.
You stand there for decades
as everything around you
starts to wither and die,
not really knowing
what it means to say goodbye
or if you said goodbye at all.
You will arrive at death with nothing but love.
Just a scratched heart with a faded name
that you can't make out,
but you will smile like no other
because a damaged libra knows
exactly who's this undying love of a heart is for.
--How could I ever say goodbye to you, my Silver.
.
